Plays Well With Others

Corporate “Fun” …

Tomorrow is our departmental picnic. We don’t have company functions, we have departmental functions. It’s strange. The same old people you always see, just outside.

At previous jobs, we have company picnics. The entire company would get together and you’d get a chance to meet people you never met before. It was nice to see new faces. Here, it’s the same people you work with day after day.

So, last year was my first departmental picnic. Now, the word picnic would evoke feelings of a fun time and enjoyment for most people, however, here they always manage to make it not fun. Because of the rules.

First off, even though we were only going to be at work for a couple of hours prior to the picnic, we were not allowed to dress down during our “working” hours. Basically meaning that we had to be in our business casual attire for those three hours we were working and then prior to the picnic we could choose to change into jeans and t-shirts. Erm. Like I’m going to change clothes … so I just went in my business casual clothing. This year, we can wear jeans all day, but can’t wear sneakers during working hours. Ugh. Seems like a load bullshit to me. We are the marketing department … it’s not like we interact with customers or anything. Who’s going to see us for those two hours we are in the building.

Last year, another rule was that you had the choice to either go to the picnic or stay in the building and work. Also, if you left the picnic prior to 5PM, you had to come straight to work and complete your shift, thus eliminating people ditching from the picnic early. I think most of the managers were pretty lax on this one, except for mine, which split up. One went back to the office and one stayed at the picnic to keep an eye on people. Kind of like Kindergarten … which is basically what this is — a grown up Kindergarten.

Last year, the entire week was extremely slow, much like this week. About an hour before the picnic was to start, my boss laid a pile of work on the entire team causing us to be about three hours late to the picnic. Of course, they went ahead and made it to the picnic on time. So, we all arrived and there wasn’t any food left. Luckily, the organizers had made a run to the store and managed to buy more food for those of us that missed out. And the food was awful. The hamburgers were okay, but the pasta salads were gross and the desserts all had nuts in them, so all I ate was the hamburger. This year I’m bringing a pasta salad so at the very least I’ll be able to eat something besides a hamburger.

Then there were the games. Ugh. I hate games. I don’t play games. But I had to find a way to occupy myself for the five hours I had to spend there, so I just watched the balloon toss, the basketball game and the softball games. Ugh.

At 4PM, one of the big bosses came over and said that we could leave early if we wanted. Gee, a whole hour. What ever will I do with all that free time. But it’s typical of this department.

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