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The Totem Pole Effect …

There’s one thing that’s very noticeable about working at Investor’s Megacorp. We’re all made very aware of where we sit on the corporate totem pole. From where we park to what our cubicles look like to the placement of our cubicles … everything points out that you are either high or low on the corporate totem pole.

It starts when we arrive at work. Those highest on the totem pole get to park in the underground parking directly under the building they work in. The rest of us park in a parking structure outside of the building we work in. But even in the parking structure we are made aware of our status. See, there are those that have reserved parking in the parking structure and then those of us that have to just hunt for parking. I usually park on the roof since no one else is up there and I can park near the elevator. But I haven’t even mentioned those that are driven to work in limo’s, paid for by the company. Ugh.

So, once we’ve parked, those that are parked underneath their buildings can just shoot up to their offices through the elevator, while those of us in the parking structure have to walk through wind and sleet and rain to get to our building and then take the stairs up. I could take the elevator, but they really don’t make it as easy for us peons to actually get to the elevator from the parking structure. It’s faster to take the stairs.

Once upstairs, you are either a clock puncher or not. Obviously the clock punchers are lower on the totem pole. That’s where I fit in.

At our desks, you can easily tell if you are a top dog or a bottom feeder. The executives have corner window offices, they have furniture made of real wood, including their filing cabinets and meeting tables. They also have leather on their chairs. Next down the line are those that have window offices, not quite as large and no meeting tables. Then there are those that have window cubicles. These people usually get upgraded fabric on their seats, but have laminate cubicle type furniture. Then there are the rest of us. We get laminate cubicle furniture and the cheapest fabric on our seats. I also sit as close to the center of the building as possible, meaning I’m as far from the windows as possible. I did manage to get an upgrade on my office chairs though because I told them that their cheap chairs were making my back hurt. Here’s something that pisses me off … how come all these people that have window offices always close the damn blinds. They fight for these offices and then shut the blinds so that it looks like a damn wall. Ugh.

Anyhow, welcome to corporate hell … where everyone’s a number.

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